Some people always say that they would do anything for the ones they love, but when it really matters the most, they are the first ones who easily give up the fight. It’s so easy to make such promises to your romantic partner especially when the times are great, but what would happen if you find your relationship facing the most challenging obstacles in your relationship?
Can you survive the tests of true and genuine love? Or are you just one of the many who don’t have the courage and the patience to deserve a happy and long-lasting relationship? This article will help you answer these questions.
Here are the signs that your relationship will not last.
1. You always choose your words to hide what you truly feel.
The best relationships are built on honesty and openness, not on lies and deceit. Some people in a relationship think that carefully choosing their words in order to manipulate the truth can prevent arguments and unnecessary fights. While it might sound noble, you’re not actually protecting your partner’s feelings – you’re just too scared that your partner will see who you truly are.
You have to know that your partner deserves your openness, the same truthfulness that they will willingly give to you without hesitation. White lies may save you from the present but they will surely haunt you in the future – until they become strong enough to actually put a dent on your relationship.
2. You don’t want to talk about or take on the bad times.
You’re a great partner when days are happy and times are great, but when it comes to the trying times and rainy days, you become too afraid to face them head-on. You hide from your responsibilities in the relationship and just leave your partner to face them on their own, alone, abandoned and almost failing. You only emerge once the dust has settled and the storm has passed.
If you think the scenario above is familiar to you, then there are things that you really should think about if you want your relationship to last.
3. You are not capable of finding the right work-life balance.
It’s totally understandable if you prioritize work above all the other aspects of your life. In fact, a good partner will even encourage you to aim higher and promise you that they will be there by your side in every step of the way. However, the problem comes when you are unable to give your time and attention to your relationship. For instance, do you feel that your relationship is just a “bonus” and you don’t feel that you need to do your part as a partner? Do you think of your girlfriend/boyfriend as a mere distraction?
If you agree with these two questions, then expect that you’re in for a breakup sooner than you think.
4. You want your partner to represent your definition of perfection.
You have this picture of an “ideal” girl/guy in your head and you want your partner to fit these impossible descriptions. While it’s important to aspire for a perfect partner, you have to make sure that you, too, deserve perfection. The problem is, people’s ideas of a perfect partner are often inspired by the unrealistic standards set by fictional characters: models in a magazine, television actors, superhero figures, etc.
The only thing that you really have to do here is, accept the reality that you have and appreciate what your partner has to offer. Unless you can be a real-life Marvel Superhero or you’re a Korean Drama character come to life, then you deserve your own Wonder Woman or a princess from a faraway land.
5. You easily give up on your relationship when times are tough.
You always threaten to end the relationship if things are not going your way. Sometimes, you even want to break up with your partner just because you’re not strong enough to face the consequences of your wrong decisions. If you observe the same pattern in your relationship, then it wouldn’t be surprising if you don’t end up together.
ALSO READ: How to Fight for Your Relationship and Not Give Up on the One You Love
6. You’re not supportive of your partner’s professional goals.
In order to survive in this world, you need to be practical. Just like what a famous line from a classic song says, love won’t keep you alive. While love can let you live a happy and inspiring life, you’ll need to focus on other equally important and practical things, too: personal, financial. and professional goals.
That is why it can be impractical and unfair to your partner if you always make them feel that their professional goals are not important. If you’re in a relationship with someone driven and goal-oriented, then keeping up with their dreams can be both a privilege and a test of true commitment.
7. You talk about them behind their back.
Talking about your partner behind their back is the greatest insult that you can ever give someone, especially if you are in a relationship with this person. It’s an unforgivable act of betrayal if you always talk to your friends about what’s happening in your relationship especially when it comes to your partner’s deepest secrets, or if it’s about the things that took them a tremendous amount of faith and courage to tell you.
If you break their trust this way, it’s just a matter of time until they finally realize that you don’t deserve their truth.
8. You always ignore or even underestimate their ideas.
Your partner needs to feel that their ideas matter, and you need to understand that you are not the only person in the relationship who knows what they are doing. Just like any type of partnership, you need to be willing and open to each other’s ideas, opinions and perspectives.
Ignore these things and you’ll always find yourselves arguing and fighting over trivial matters.
9. You think that helping them out is costing too much of your time.
If you don’t have the time to be with your partner especially when they need someone to give them a hand, then you shouldn’t be in a relationship in the first place. Remember that being in a partnership means doing your part and helping each other out especially if there is no one else to lend them a hand.
10. You’re a good talker and a terrible listener.
Do you always find yourself hogging the spotlight during conversations? Do you take up most of your “talk time” and forget that your partner has their stories to tell, too? Being a good listener is one of the qualities of a good partner – and it can make a huge difference if you want your relationship to last.
Hopefully, these pieces of advice will help you finally find your forever. For others who just realized why their previous relationships didn’t work out, then it’s high time that you learned your lessons. Good luck and have a great life!