What do you do when a girl shows interest in you, dates you, and still doesn’t want to call you her boyfriend?
That’s a rather big predicament, isn’t it?
Falling in love is supposed to be a happy experience, not a confusing one.
But every now and then, there comes a time when you unintentionally fall in love with a girl who seems right, but is completely wrong for you.
[Read: 12 easy signs to know just how much a girl likes you]
Are you in love with a girl who blows hot and cold, who behaves like your girlfriend at times and snubs you like you’re a nobody at other times when she doesn’t need you?
You’re probably giving your heart away to a girl who could just be toying with you, because she feels like it!
[Read: How to read mixed signals from a girl and turn it into love]
Why do some girls just lead guys on?
If you’re in a complicated relationship with a girl who behaves like your girlfriend, but doesn’t want to date you, you’re definitely getting led on.
Do you wonder why a few girls behave this way?
The reasons could be plenty.
But almost always, the girl who’s leading you on probably likes you, but she needs more time to make up her mind about whether she really wants to date you. She may just be confused right now. [Read: 18 easy failproof ways to get a girl to fall in love with you]
A few girls could lead a guy on because they want some drama in their own lives, or because they like getting a guy’s attention. It makes them feel better about themselves.
Or in some circumstances, the girl who’s giving you mixed signals and leading you on could really like you, but she may be a people pleaser or an attention whore who’s too worried what her friends may think of you *because she assumes you’re not good enough to show off to her friends* [Read: 16 attention whore signs to watch out for!]
Some people are just too worried about the world and what people think, and their happiness depends more on what others say and think than what really matters to them or what they need. [Read: 20 signs to recognize a people pleaser when you see one]
Are you reading the signs wrong?
Now as much all guys would love to bitch about girls or grumble about how fickle a few girls are, there is still a pretty big chance that the girl you like isn’t leading you on at all!
Perhaps, she really likes you as a friend and is just being friendly with you because she feels comfortable around you. Girls are a lot more touchy feely than guys, and there’s a very good chance that you may be misunderstanding that friendly touch for a flirty touch. After all, there’s only a veiled line separating flirty friends and mixed signals.
And if you start falling for a friend, you may assume she likes you back too because in your mind, that’s what you’re secretly hoping for. [Read: How to tell a friend you love her without losing her]
15 signs she’s just leading you on
If you’re convinced the girl who’s messing with your mind and your heart isn’t just being friendly, and is actually trying to lead you on, read these 15 signs she’s leading you on.
It’s very easy to pinpoint a girl who’s just toying with your heart. And if you do see these signs, walk away before it’s too late!
#1 The relationship with no name. She flirts with you, goes out on dates with you, but doesn’t give the relationship a name. Both of you may be intensely attracted to each other, but she still calls you a good friend even as all your friends wonder what’s going on.
#2 She makes out with you. She may make out with you, or she may cuddle and cozy up with you now and then. But how far things go in bed or whether both of you would even make out on a date completely depends on her mood and her plans. You’re just happy with the scraps she throws depending on how she feels at a particular moment. [Read: 15 reasons why nice guys finish last all the time!]
#3 It’s a secret relationship. A few of her friends may know both of you are close, or are on the verge of dating, but none of her friends have any idea that something’s even going on between the both of you. It’s a secret relationship and she wants to keep it that way.
#4 She’s distant. She’s distant and aloof when you get clingy or try to trail her all the time. When you give her a lot of attention, she tries to keep her distance from you.
#5 And then she wants to be closer. When you give her the space because she’s being distant, she immediately changes her behavior and starts craving for your attention when you back away. She tries to keep in touch with you and calls you often just to win your attention back. [Read: How to avoid the friend zone and make a girl desire you]
#6 She hasn’t been in too many relationships. She claims to have dated very few guys. She probably tells you she’s been in very few relationships too. But that’s probably because she leads on most guys she dates and doesn’t like calling them her ex boyfriends. If you know she’s dated a particular guy before and she claims she never dated that guy, but they were just friends, she’s definitely leading you on too!
#7 She makes herself appear helpless. She convinces you that you’re very important to her and that she needs you. She makes herself appear weak and helpless without your advice and emotional support. She tells you she needs you, and that she’s very close to you, and she doesn’t know what she’d do without you in her life.
#8 She blows hot and cold. She’s friendly and close for several days or weeks, and all of a sudden, she ignores you and won’t have time for you again. You see this happening pretty frequently, where she ignores you when she’s getting a lot of attention from other guys. [Read: The real reason behind why girls are so fickle about guys]
#9 She needs you when she’s lonely. She comes to you only when she’s lonely. She doesn’t remember you or care about you when she’s having fun. But when she’s bored or alone, she behaves like she misses you so much and can’t stop thinking about you. And you need to make time for her.
#10 Flirty phone conversations. There’s more intimacy over the phone than in person. She may not always throw herself at you when both of you meet up in person. But she’s always warm and flirty over the phone, or while texting each other. She may even get naughty over the phone or have phone sex with you. [Read: 20 dirty questions to ask a girl and make her wet]
#11 She wants you completely. She hates it when you give another girl any attention. She would even try to win your heart back and woo you with loving or seductive words when you start falling for another girl.
#12 She may fall for another guy. When a girl is leading you on, she knows you’d behave like a lost puppy and trail her even if she likes another guy. This girl who’s leading you on may tell you about all the guys who are giving her attention, and she may even tell you about a guy she’s falling for. It’s completely acceptable for her to like another guy, but when you do the same or talk about another girl, she pretends like she’s not interested in hearing what you have to say.
#13 She hooks up. She may date another guy and still give you her attention, which makes you feel special, and confused at the same time. Eventually, you don’t care whether she’s another guy’s girlfriend, you just want her attention and her love. [Read: Is a girl with a boyfriend flirting with you?]
#14 She doesn’t want to acknowledge that you like her. She’s very evasive when it comes to talking about your feelings. Every time you tell her that you love her or want to date her exclusively, she’d just smile or change the subject. Or in the worst case, she may tell you she can’t think of you as anything more than a friend. But she’d still lean in, wrap her arms around you and kiss you to make you feel better!
#15 She tells you she loves you. You almost believe you’re in a relationship with her already. She may tell you that she loves you and needs you, and yet, she doesn’t behave like your girlfriend. She blows hot and cold, and she just expects you to cater to her whims and fancies as and when she needs your attention. [Read: 12 secrets you need to know about love hate relationships]
A girl who’s leading you on may be using you!
If you’re in a complicated relationship with a girl who’s just leading you on, you need to realize that her subtle manipulation tactics are just screwing your mind. She’s playing you and you’re falling for all her tricks because your love for her clouds your judgment.
Even if do you confront her, or give her an ultimatum to date you or stop talking to you, she may break down or tell you that she really likes you, but she just needs more time to sort the confusions in her mind. [Read: 12 signs a girl is just using you for all the wrong reasons]
What you need to do if a girl is leading you on?
Think about what you really want for yourself. Of course, it feels really nice to hear from her and hear the sweet and sexy things she says, but you do know deep inside that all this is going nowhere. Eventually, she may just give you the cold shoulder or date someone else.
Once you’re stuck in the clutches of a girl who leads you on, you have no choice. You screw your mind and obsess about where the relationship is going. You’re confused and frustrated, annoyed and angry, and yet, you can’t leave her or walk away from her because she knows just what to say and do to dig her nails deeper into your heart. [Read: How to get over a girl who doesn’t really like you back]
And every time you try to restrain yourself from getting in touch with her, or try to avoid falling in love with her, she’d try everything to make you lose your resolve and stay in love with her.
This girl who leads you on is like an addiction you can’t get rid of. And the only way to end this miserable excuse of a relationship is by picking a fight with her that’ll make her dislike you.
Pick a fight and say something that’ll hurt her ego, which would bring out her inner monster and make her hate you. Girls who love leading guys on have fragile egos, and when you drive a stake into her weak ego, she’d hate you for it. And there’s a big chance that she’d walk away from you for good.
Of course, you’ll feel miserable for letting her get away from you. But you do know the relationship was a lost cause already, don’t you?
[Read: How to let go of the girl you love by hating her]
Use these 15 signs to find out if a girl is leading you on. And if you do see these traits in a girl who’s blowing hot and cold with you, get away as fast as you can, however you can! If you hold on to the relationship any longer, it may just be too darn late and too darn hard.