20 Men Of Reddit Reveal The Relationship Advice That Helped Them

A broken heart is one of the hardest things to heal from. It’s one of those wounds that runs deep, psychologically tormenting your mind and stinging much worse than a cut or a bruise ever could. Some people even say that you never truly heal from a broken heart, and we’re sure that many of you out there would agree with that. Most of us have all felt the pain of rejection or losing someone we love. And the fact of the matter is, everyone seems to really struggle when it comes to getting over heartbreak. No matter how strong-willed you are, battling a broken heart is almost always an uphill battle, one that really challenges your mental condition.

And heartbreak affects guys just as much as it does girls. Even though we might think guys are thick-skinned, unemotional guys who never cry, this just isn’t true. There are a lot of guys who have really struggled with heartbreak, and some of them have taken to Reddit to explain the lessons they’ve learned from dealing with this difficult period in their lives. And surprisingly enough, some of the things they’ve shared are really meaningful and deep. You might even find yourself learning a thing or two from these interesting Reddit confessions!

21Distract Yourself From The Heartbreak

Sometimes, when we suffer heartbreak, the only option is to try and distract ourselves from the pain. Whether that means working harder, getting more into your hobbies, or spending time with your friends, some of us believe that distracting yourself in any way possible is the best way forward. One guy on Reddit revealed what he learned from heartbreak, saying:

“Definitely keeping busy and distracting yourself with other things, but I think that you need to just accept the emotions sometimes…”

“…Once you let yourself cry a few times you are much closer to moving on. It’s a sprint vs a marathon and can really suck, but it may make the rest of your life much better.”

20Find Someone Else

For many people, the first thing they want to do after a heartache is put it all behind them, and for them, the simplest way to do this is by finding someone new. We’re sure a lot of you can relate to this, and it makes sense in the long run. And if it works for some people, we can’t bash that…Another guy on Reddit revealed:

“I found someone else recently who is everything I want and is entirely happy but there is still a large spot in my heart for the one that got away…”

“…Nothing I would ever act on but that love doesn’t just stop. I guess it depends on what you do with those strong feelings. I write music so putting them into words and melodies was pretty constructive, and help put what is going on in your brain into perspective.”

19It Will Fade

This guy’s definitely received the short end of the stick when it comes to relationships. But despite all his pain, he’s managed to learn from his experiences, and now he’s sharing his advice on Reddit. From his experiences, he has learned that the pain will eventually fade, no matter how strong it is. This guy on Reddit revealed:

“Take it from someone whose fiancée and best friend left him after 7 years together for someone else – This will fade and you’ll be able to sleep again. Not now. Not in a week. But you’ll get there…”

“…It hurts like heck right now. And justifiably so. It’s going to hurt a lot for probably a few months. But the pain will start to fade. It’ll gradually slip into being a dull ache instead of the current sharp stabbing hurt.”

18Go Somewhere New

Sometimes, it’s a lot easier to tell people what not to do after a heartbreak. After all, we learn from our mistakes, right? This guy on Reddit took it upon himself to share with other guys the things that he learned not to do, and it’s pretty enlightening. He revealed on Reddit:

“DON’T fill the void with meaningless encounters or other people. Take time for yourself. DON’T go on a party tour to somewhere exotic…”

“…Depending on the freshness of the scars, you’ll see her/his face everywhere and your happiness will mostly be a fake. DO move somewhere new for a while, even if it means taking time off your job. Explore new things, new places, and new people. Get lost in the new world and the time it gives you.”

17Immerse Yourself In Hobbies

This guy’s confession is pretty simple and straightforward, but sometimes it’s the simplest and most basic life lessons that resonate the strongest. This guy has been doing some thinking after his heartbreak, and he’s revealed some of the best lessons he’s learned from the process. He stated on Reddit:

“Immersed myself in hobbies, entertainment, reading, and communing with nature and got back in touch with who I really was despite that heartbreak.”

It really seems like this guy has done a ton of thinking and reflecting after his breakup, and it does seem as though he’s learned a lot from the challenging process he’s been through.

16Spend Time Improving Yourself

Sometimes, heartbreaks can actually be a positive thing. They can inspire you to make some meaningful changes in your life, and in the end, you can come out of them being way stronger. That’s the lesson this guy took away from his heartbreak journey, and it’s pretty interesting… He stated on Reddit:

“I spent a lot of time on myself. I had to revisit all my old interest and ask myself why I didn’t do them anymore…”

“…I wrote down everything that I loved even from the tiniest things, I wrote down what I wanted to do while I was with that person, and what I could now do that I was no longer with them. I learned to dream big rather than realistically, and nothing but great things have happened for me since the breakup.”

15Just Keep Going

Sometimes there is no easy solution to heartbreak. The only real thing you can do is just get your head down and keep going. It sounds simple, but sometimes all it really takes is for you to make the decision that you’re going to get through this, no matter what. One guy on Reddit revealed:

“I don’t really know. I just kept going because I was forced to. I was hurt at 14 and don’t think I really actually felt good enough to legitimately move on until I was about 17…”

“…Even now, I’m almost 21 and I still miss it. At this point it’s not the loss anymore, it’s the fact that I can’t imagine loving somebody else as much as I loved her again. I’m sure I will someday, but it sucks not knowing when that will be. I have tried and even though I loved other girls, but it still wasn’t anywhere near the feeling of falling in love back then.”

14Cheese Enchiladas And Good Music

While we’ve been through some pretty deep and personal confessions and life lessons when it comes to the subject of heartbreak, sometimes the most poignant lessons can be slightly odd. That doesn’t make them any less meaningful, however. One guy swears that the best method is a blend of enchiladas and music… The guy on Reddit stated:

“For a short-term solution to deal with the initial soul-crushing feeling, I recommend cheese enchiladas (or something else really cheesy and delicious) and some good music…”

“…I recommend whatever is the most blues-like/sad-ish in your favorite genre (power metal for me). I read that sad music actually makes you feel better when you’re sad yourself. After that, distract yourself with friends, family, and physical/mental activity. Good luck!”

13Get Help From Those You Trust

So many of us like to take on the world by ourselves, especially when we’ve suffered heartbreak. Having someone break our heart can leave us bitter and distrustful of the people around us. But as one guy points out, it’s so important to let others help us through these hard times. Another guy on Reddit revealed:

“I had help from those I trusted. My best friends helped me and looked after me. To be fair, they were the only people to do so, everyone was like “Hey, you okay” and then just treat me like nothing afterward…”

“…But my best friends, who could never imagine seeing me experience so much pain, were concerned. And I am grateful.”

12Cut Off All Contact

For some guys, the only way to really get over heartbreak is doing something pretty extreme. While some of us might be able to just put that person out of our minds, other guys say that the only way they can get over someone is if they literally delete everything that could ever remind themselves of that ex. This guy on Reddit explained:

“Cut off all contact and reminders of that person…”

“…Block them on Facebook/Twitter/Instagram/etc. Even hide mutual friends so you don’t see them in pictures or whatever. There may even be some friends you need to cut out of your life for a while or even forever. Then you need to pick up a hobby if you don’t already have one. Invest time in that. Invest time in other friends.”

11Let Yourself Feel The Pain

Sometimes, we have a tendency to deny, deny and deny some more. But often we forget that allowing ourselves to feel those emotions is healthy. Not only that, but doing so can help us get past those emotions, especially when it comes to heartbreak. Great advice from one guy on Reddit, and this is something we can all learn from… The guy on Reddit explained:

“Talk about how you feel with friends, cry if you have to, but let yourself feel the pain because only then can you really get over it and move on…”

“…Every day it will die down just a little bit, but it will still feel like an eternity to you. You will go from mixed feelings of hatred and sadness until you simply just don’t want to feel anything anymore.”

10The Day Will Come When You Stop Thinking About Them

Sometimes, the best advice comes from those who have been through heartbreak, and have seen the light at the end of the tunnel. These people know that there will come a time when you get over it, and as unbelievable it might sound to those who have just suffered heartbreak, it’s comforting to hear that it will eventually end. This particular guy on Reddit explained:

“One day, and that day could take awhile to show up, but one day you’ll tell yourself you’re sick of looking them up on social media…”

“…You’re sick of thinking about them all the time. You’ll delete their texts and unfollow them on social media and you’re ready to get back to living life. You’ve finally made the first steps but here comes the real challenge. You need to stop thinking about them.”

9Take Joy In The Small Things

Sometimes, we take the world around us for granted. We can get so caught up in things like our relationships, that we forget to be thankful of the little things. We live in a wonderful world, and most of us are incredibly lucky. So even though you might think it’s the end of the world when you get your heart broken, realize that you have it pretty good.That’s the point this guy on Reddit was trying to make when he said:

“Put one foot in front of the other, keep moving forward and realize that what is in the past is already decided, but always try and learn from it…”

“…As far as recovery; do the things that you love, be yourself, pick up a hobby that you haven’t pursued in a while, or take up a new one. Feel joy in small everyday things: the sun on your back, quiet falling snow, music that you love, anything and everything. Happiness is there, it always was, and it will be in the future.”

8He Did Everything Wrong

We have to learn from our mistakes. And this guy made some serious mistakes when he tried to get over his heartbreak. But at least he knows now what he did wrong, and is able to go on Reddit and explain to others his mistakes, so they don’t do the same thing. He admitted on Reddit:

“I did everything wrong. I retreated from people and dove into video games, I went back to my old vices, I stress ate, I was mean to her, then to other people as well, and I drank and grew fatter by the day…”

“…I was miserable and got over her in spite of what I did, not because of it. What I should have done is occupied my time with fun things to do with other people. And found another girl. And preferably been physically active somehow.”

7Get Back Into Sports And Socializing

You’d be really surprised how effective sports can be on improving your mood. Sports release endorphins and help battle even the worst cases of breakup blues – and that’s what this guy figured out during his heartbreak. His advice? Do some sports and get socializing! He explained on Reddit:

“What helped for me is to spend the time you would’ve spent on your ex but on yourself. For me, I got back into sports I used to play…”

“…Started socializing more with friends I lost a bit of contact with. All of the time I will spend time on trying to become the best version of myself. Not only is it beneficial to your well-being, but you are much likely to attract the right kinds of people in your life :)”

6Only Time Will Heal

Sometimes, the most honest lessons are the hardest to accept. When you fall in love and then get your heart broken, do you ever truly heal? This guy seems to think not, and it’s hard to argue with him. He stated on Reddit:

“Nothing helps other than time. There are ways to make it better and less painful, such as talking to friends and focusing on other things…”

“…But I can promise you that its a tough and awful experience, and it feels like its never going to end.” Many of you will probably agree that there are no easy tricks when it comes to getting over heartbreak, and the only way to truly heal is to let time take its course.

5Try To Look At It As A Learning Experience

While learning how to deal with heartbreak can be hard, at least you’re learning something. Even though it’s a hard lesson, you can always look on the bright side. You will learn from this, and you probably won’t make the same mistakes going forward in your future relationships. Or at least that’s this guy’s logic. He stated on Reddit:

“I broke up with my ex 6 months ago and I just recently got over her. Now I can talk about her, think back to the relationship and everything without feeling too bad…”

“…I tried to look at it as a learning experience, what I did good, what I did poorly, what went wrong etc. Try to stay positive and keep your focus on anything but him/her. It’s a long tough ride but you’ll come out much stronger.”

4Get A New “Friend”

Sometimes guys get over their broken hearts in strange, unexpected way. This guy said that the number one thing that helped him through this hard time was the fact that he started a relationship which was basically a “friends with benefits” type situation. Hey, if it worked for him, who are we to judge? He explained on Reddit:

“Broke up with my girlfriend a few months ago. It broke my heart that I had to do it but it wasn’t a healthy relationship and we were both better off this way…”

“…Don’t think I’ve ever cried so hard in my life than I did the night I broke up with her. Me and my best friend have been going on and off for about a month now, basically a friend with benefits type thing. It’s honestly really helping because I’m getting to focus on someone else, but not in a love kind of way.”

3Focus On Others

Sometimes, it really helps to take the attention off yourself for once. Chances are, if you’ve just been through some major heartbreak, you’re going to be thinking a lot about yourself. What could I have done better? Is there something wrong with me? All of that goes rushing through your head. Well, as one guy stated, it sometimes helps you put your attention on others. He explained on Reddit:

“Surround yourself with the people who are closest to you, in whatever way you can. Focusing on other people is the best way to mend a broken heart.”

You have to admit, what he says makes a lot of sense, and this could probably really help those suffering from heartbreak.

2Delete All Your Social Media

This is another guy who’s a fan of taking drastic measures when it comes to getting over heartbreak. In his mind, the only way to get over someone is to delete all your social media. This is to stop himself “checking up on her.” You know, he might just have a point, as extreme as it might sound… He explained on Reddit:

“The first thing I did was delete all my social media. Not temporarily but permanently…”

“…Because I knew myself and I knew I would check up on her if I had them. The best advice I can give is don’t be ashamed of your feelings. There will be times when you miss them. You’re gonna hate yourself and think you’ll never get over them because of these thoughts. I was fortunate to have a best friend I could vent to that wouldn’t judge these feelings. Of course, you’re going to miss them, you were in love.”

1Play Horror Video Games

Another interesting way in which a guy got over heartbreak was by playing video games. It might sound crazy to all you non-gamers out there, but the rest of us know that video games can be the ultimate escape in these kinds of situations. And this guy, in particular, says that Horror Games are his favorite for getting over heartbreak. He explained on Reddit:

“Horror games are great for battling depression. And you’re right, that does sound crazy. But I guarantee they help a lot…”

“…Fear is an all-consuming emotion. It’s a natural reaction that redirects your mind to the threat completely. This is great, because getting your mind off of your broken heart is a big step. Accomplishing things releases chemicals in your brain that also fight depression.”

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