1. In the middle of foreplay, she was about to get on top of me and she reaches over into the nightstand by the bed and pulls out a LOADED gun and told me to put it against her head while she rode me. I’ve never noped the fuck out quicker in my life.
2. She wanted to be woken up with s*x, but it did nothing for me because she always woke up first.
3. She would absolutely quiver about having her eyes licked. I didn’t know that oculolinctus was a thing until I dated her.
4. Guy I dated tried to put his big toe…in me. Typing this is giving me cold chills all over again. Needless to say I declined and didn’t see him again.
5. Ex used to really get off on me fucking other girls. She worked away a lot so when she came back she’d ride the fuck out of me if she smelled a woman’s perfume on my clothes or found some panties that weren’t hers. She had me fuck her best friend, and I’m not going to lie and say the s*x wasn’t great but it was super weird.
We dated for a few months after the best friend fuck but she broke up with me because she found out I had been buying thongs and perfume so I didn’t have to cheat on her.
6. I had an ex fwb who got really turned on by being vomited on during blowjobs… it’s so messy and also I gotta say personally, throwing up doesn’t ever get me in the mood for anything but a shower and some mouthwash…
7. My ex had a fetish for calling me “mommy” but it made me super uncomfortable and was a factor in our breakup.
8. He liked the idea of fooling around in public and almost getting caught. I like being in my apartment or hotels or places where it’s totally normal and acceptable to bang. The anxiety of almost getting caught was a turnoff to me.
9. She was really into gay porn, like, to the point of running a Tumblr blog about gay hentai when such content was allowed on there. She had once expressed a desire to see me either fuck a guy in the ass or be fucked in the ass by a guy for her enjoyment.
10. I was eating her ass because I thought she liked it. She was letting me eat her ass because she thought I liked it. Actually took like 2 years to figure out.
11. I once dated a guy that told me he had a thing for waterboarding. As in, he had waterboarded his exes (with their consent). That’s a nope from me, brah.
12. I once dated a guy that wouldn’t let me make a sound. We fucked in silence.
13. A guy I dated had a foot fetish. He was obsessed with my feet. He bought me socks and would want me to text him what shoes I was wearing and such. I take good care of my feet so I could understand the like. At first, I found it interesting as I hadn’t dated anyone with this fetish. I let him lick and suck my toes a few times, seeing if I liked it. It tickled, did not find it s*xy. That’s when I decided, not for me. Really nice guy.
14. One of my exes liked me to slap and tug on his balls. It didn’t do much for me and honestly for the first 6 months I was too afraid to do much to them.
15. Biting. Normally I am more than happy with that. But he would do so unexpectedly, no warning, and hard enough that it would bruise or break skin. Oh and he would do like a shark, shaking his head back and forth hard. And in usually the most sensitive places. That takes the fun out of it and set me on edge so much that I couldn’t get off because I was always ready for the next bite.
16. My ex happened to have a fetish for… transformation. Primarily weird ones though, not like werewolves or anything, but people turning into cars and shit like that. Definitely not something that you can do anything with.
17. She had a fetish for blood. No joke. She gets turned on at the sight of blood. One time I badly scraped my knee, told her about it and she asked me to send a pic. The next reply, she said she was soaking wet. Good thing I broke up with her before we could have s*x, I don’t want to be excreting both blood and semen at the same time.
18. Since I’m a teacher they liked to act like a “naughty student” who needed to be punished. You probably don’t realize how gross and fucked that is as an actual teacher who works with teenagers daily. I hate when any of my SOs try to super s*xualize my career.
19. He couldn’t finish unless he pulled out and came on my back. So we always did doggie-style, which I like fine but not every time. I was young and didn’t call him on anything since he was older and my first. Not sure if this is actually a fetish but he couldn’t come any other way.
20. She would bite my lip really hard while kissing and then like pull away as her teeth scraped my lip. Told her many times that I wasn’t into it and she kept doing it while like staring at me like a crazed animal. It wasn’t hot.
21. One of my exes was very into phone s*x – and aside from that not being a turn-on for me, she was really bad at it.
22. My ex fiancé had a giant fetish. Literally, he fetishized giants. He refused to ever be on top, had me stand on the bed and walk around so I looked extra tall, and asked me to tell him how small and puny he was and how big and giant I was while I rode him. He liked it when I said I was taller than buildings and trees, like hundreds of feet tall. He even would ask me to say “fee fie fo fum” like the giant from Jack and the Beanstalk. I hated all of it but it was the only way he wanted to have s*x so I put up with it for three years. Definitely super glad I don’t have to do it for the rest of my life.
23. Hair pulling. I suffer regular migraines so my head can be really sensitive. She kept trying to do it even though I told her it hurt a lot and ruined the mood for me.
24. She was really into older men like 40-50, we were 20.
25. I found out a little while after we broke up that he likes to imagine his partner is a younger (underage) sister.
26. My ex had a mud fetish, like, when he was younger would go into like a bog and have s*x with the mud. Where we lived, we didn’t have any bogs as adults so he made enough chocolate pudding to fill the tub, he had me lay in the tub while he poured the pudding all over me and filled the tub almost all the way up. He then got on top of me and we had s*x. It wasn’t bad really, the cleanup was a nightmare but the problem was I ended up getting a UTI from it so I didn’t let him do it again after that.
27. My ex would always painfully squeeze my nuts right after a blowjob. When I screamed she would just look at me and say, “You’re welcome.”
She thought she was being kinky… all it did was give me an irrational fear of getting a BJ ever again.
28. Once had a guy who couldn’t get it up unless I farted in his face.
29. He loved to fuck tits and it did not do shit for me but he loved it so I let him because at least someone enjoyed my boobs.
30. I once had a guy that asked me to wear my work uniform. I worked at McDonald’s at the time, back when we wore clunky polyester…