1. Use cold water to wash cum out of hair etc. Hot water denatures the proteins and makes it super sticky.
2. Never go from anal to vaginal or oral. That’s a one way street.
3. ALWAYS have a Safe word.
4. Ladies, NEVER stay with someone who’s not trying to pleasure you! If he’s selfish in bed, drop him. He’s not worth it!
5. Ladies, if a guy asks if he’s doing good, don’t save his feelings. Let him know it’s not enjoyable and to try something else/tell him what he should do. The moment y’all figure out a happy medium, you’ll be in the bedroom more than any other room.
6. Never get cum in your eye. It feels like stabbing your eye with hot knives.
7. Pee after you have s*x. Never skip on it.
8. Don’t have s*x on a beach, sand gets in places where you would never want sand.
9. Get tested for STIs. Don’t take your partner’s word for it that they’re healthy.
10. Water is the opposite of lube.
11. I guarantee. I FUCKING GUARANTEE. That your vagina is not weird-shaped or weird-colored.
Every vagina is different. Some girls have puffy lips. Some have tiny lips. Some have longer inner lips. Some have large clitorises. Some have tiny clitorises. Some are red. Some are pale. Some are very dark.
ALL of this is 100% normal. Just like penises, vaginas come in all shapes and sizes and colors. Don’t be ashamed of your body because it isn’t a replica of the girl in the porn you watched last night. Don’t be ashamed because it doesn’t match the art you saw online. I GUARANTEE your vagina is totally fine as it is.
12. If you can’t have an honest and frank conversation about a kink, you are NOT READY to engage in that kink with that partner!
13. Use condoms, pullout method is only 78% effective and does not prevent STDs, neither does birth control. Just be safe so you don’t catch something that can ruin your life.
14. You do not owe ANYONE s*x. You don’t owe the girl all over you s*x. You don’t owe the man who bought you dinner s*x. You do not owe anyone s*x.
15. If you think anyone you’re sharing a room with won’t notice you getting with your partner. YOU ARE WRONG. They are always awake. ALWAYS.
16. Invest in your s*x toys! Don’t cheap out, go for silicone, glass, or another non-porous material.
17. Antibiotics can counteract your birth control and cause you to end up pregnant.
18. Don’t put anything in your butt that doesn’t have a flared base, there’s a lot of room back there and as you relax you don’t want anything to slip all the way inside. That’ll be a very awkward ER visit.
19. A big dick does not mean better s*x. A lot of times people with smaller penises are more willing to go above and beyond
20. Don’t stick fingers up your lady if you’ve been cooking with peppers.
21. How someone kisses and touches you is probably how they want you to touch them. Someone nibble your ear? They almost certainly want you to nibble theirs!
22. Trim your nails! Don’t just trim – sand those rough edges down with the emery board/file attachment. Freshly cut nails can do as much if not more damage than longer, well kept nails.
23. If you are a woman and you have stopped menstruating, i.e. gone through menopause completely, and then at some later date begin to bleed from your vagina, see your doctor immediately. This can be a sign of cancer but many women miss it because bleeding from their vagina is something so common it isn’t worth looking into.
24. Know that you can have an amazing s*x session while your partner has the opposite experience. So listen to their body and don’t be self serving during s*x.
25. If you have difficulty discussing what kinks you’re into or are going to be embarrassed if you suspect your partner won’t be into the same things you are, there are several ‘kink tests’ you and your partner can take. You both take the test separately and only see what you match on. Find one that is as detailed as you need and that has safeguards against spamming everything to see what the other person is into.
26. Do not ever feel like you have to perform any s*xual act that you are uncomfortable with just because a person is pressuring you. If it’s an anxiety you feel comfortable working through with that person, that’s fine and requires lots of good communication, but do NOT budge if it’s something that you are against.
27. Don’t try to learn from porn, most of what they do doesn’t actually feel good and is more about putting on a show.
28. You’ll never cure a UTI with cranberry juice. You need antibiotics. Go to the doctor before you get a kidney infection or worse.
29. If you menstruate, please please PLEASE give menstrual cups a try! It might take you awhile to find one that fits correctly, and there is a learning curve for insertion and removal, but they can be incredibly comfortable and convenient! They also last a long time and reduce so much waste since you don’t have to go through pads/tampons. Additionally, if you want to sanitize them, get those sanitizing bags for baby bottles. You just add a small amount of water and the cup, and microwave that bad boy. So much easier than boiling it in a pot of water. (Other options like period panties can also be great.)
30. Do not douche.
31. You can definitely get STDs from unprotected oral s*x.
32. Learn how to dance. People that can dance are people that can fuck. Rhythm and grace.
33. No, no, no to s*x in a hot tub.
34. Always and I mean always masturbate before making a big decision… Post nut clarity can go a long way in keeping you from doing something stupid.
35. Lube up, especially for anal.
