1. “I’m not worthy of love.” The saying about needing to love yourself before you can love anyone else isn’t exactly true. However, if you genuinely believe you aren’t worthy of being loved, then you’re going to have a hard time accepting any love that is given to you. You are going to doubt intentions. You are going to question whether people are planning on staying. You are going to make it hard for yourself to enjoy your relationships because you’ll always be waiting for them to fall apart. You need to learn that you are valuable, that you are a catch, that you are worthy of love.
2. “Every relationship is going to end like my last relationship.” History isn’t bound to repeat itself. As long as you are careful moving forward, then you won’t get hurt the same way twice. You have to remember, the last person wasn’t meant for you, but the next person might be perfect for you. They might not break your heart. They might treat it delicately. They might treat it right.
3. “I would rather stay single so I don’t get hurt.” Life is all about taking risks. Even if you stay single and swear off of relationships, you can still grow attached to people. You can still feel your heart shatter. You aren’t protecting yourself as much as you think you are. If you’re lucky enough to find someone special, you should at least give love a chance. You might get hurt in the end, but you’ll also hurt yourself by doing nothing.
4. “I’m much happier on my own than I would be in a relationship.” It’s great that you’re independent. It’s great that you don’t need anyone else in order to feel happy, successful, fulfilled. But you shouldn’t push everyone else away, just for the sake of saying you’re strong and independent. You’re allowed to care about others. You’re allowed to fall in love. You’re allowed to appear vulnerable.
5. “I’m too far behind everyone else.” It doesn’t matter what age you get married, let alone when you have your first kiss or first official relationship. Everyone moves at a different pace. Your friends might have reached certain milestones already, but it’s perfectly fine if you don’t reach those milestones until far in the future. It makes absolutely no difference, so no, you’re not too far behind. It’s not too late for you. You shouldn’t give up hope of finding love.
6. “All the good guys are taken.” If there’s no one good enough for you, you should stay single. You shouldn’t lower your standards. However, you shouldn’t discount every single person you meet under the assumption they’ll disappoint you. Some people will surprise you. Some people are worthy of your time. Some people deserve a chance.
7. “I have too much baggage.” Maybe you don’t want to get into a relationship right now because you’re still in the process of healing, but you don’t have to give up on love forever. You’re not broken. You’re not too screwed up to find someone special. You’re simply going through a rough time right now and you’re going to pull yourself out of it.