Can you think of something life-changing that you can do within 7 seconds? Seems like a massive amount of pressure for such a small amount of time. Yet, believe it or not, this is how long researchers suggest it will take for a woman to size up a man!
That’s right–move over flowers, chocolates, dinner, and all forms of romantic wooing–you now have only 7 seconds for a woman to decide whether or not you’re worth her time.
With the digital dating world rising and allowing women to toss aside potential mates as easily as “swiping left,” making a good impression quickly is more important than ever. Why? Because there’s another proverbial fish swimming along in no time! So what about the psychological makeup of a woman decides you get less time to make an impression than you have to order a cheeseburger? We’re taking a look at how women make snap judgements and what you can do to make the most of your first impression! [Read: The step-by-step guide to get a girl to notice you even before you talk to her]
It’s a flawed system
Let’s be real: 7 seconds does not a good impression make. As we stated before: what can you actually do or say within 7 seconds that could truly impress someone? Basically nothing. To compensate, looks become the prime concern. That’s right: if you’re a hottie, she’s going to keep on talking. If not… well, you may be sent packing.
Unfortunately, you could be the most interesting person she has ever met, armed with the best stories she’s ever heard, but if there’s no physical attraction right off the bat, odds are you’ve already lost her interest. It’s not as though men and women everywhere don’t know this is a flawed, highly illogical, and shallow way of thinking, but we simply can’t help but perpetuate the behavior; we are hardwired that way. Fortunately, there is a way to circumvent this natural urge.
Congratulations, you just got 23 more seconds!
So how do you graduate from the nearly impossible–to impress in “7 seconds”–to gaining 23 seconds more? Basically, it’s the luck of the draw! Old wives tales *and by wives tales we, of course, mean frat boys gathered at the bar* have sometimes implied that a woman will decide within 30 seconds whether or not she will sleep with you.
Now, realistically this doesn’t mean after 30 seconds she’ll be pulling her panties down *sorry, boys*, but rather that she hasn’t ruled it out. This is an extension of the 7-second-rule. If the first seven seconds aren’t looking too great, don’t worry; you have another 23 to work your magic. [Read: 10 really smooth moves to charm the panties off a girl]
8 do’s and don’ts of winning her over in 7 seconds
Still determined to woo her in those first 7 seconds? Wondering how to make the most of your time? Here are some simple do’s and don’ts that will show you how to win a girl over immediately *or at least not leave you looking forlornly into a future of brush-offs and lonely nights*.
#1 DON’T open with an obvious line, such as “Did it hurt… when you fell from Heaven?” These are old, cheesy, and ineffective. You should also avoid any sexist comments about her body, hair color, boob size, or ask overly personal/rude questions *hello, favorite sex position*.. Basically, anything you’ve seen douchebags ask on Tinder is going to be a giant no-no for real life first impressions. [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never use]
#2 DO say something funny. One of the best ways to woo a woman is to tickle her funny bone. This means one of the best things you can do with your 7 seconds of “GO” time is make her laugh. At the end of your encounter, she may not remember what color your hair is or what you were wearing, but she sure as heck is going to remember what made her belly-laugh in public. [Read: How to make a girl laugh out loud and fall hard for you]
#3 DON’T overshare. We’re not sure what’s worse: asking her if she loves giving BJ’s, or oversharing about your recent fight with your brother, Jake. The weird issues you have with your mother, and how your ex tore your heart out and proceeded to incite a spiral of self-doubt in you are topics best left for subsequent dates. Bringing up these topics is definitely not how you want to spend your 7 seconds.
#4 DO use a quote. Girls like quotes; they make a potential date seem educated, intellectual, romantic, and mysterious. Trust us. There’s a reason why Instagram is flooded with filtered pictures depicting typewriter fonts and F. Scott Fitzgerald quotes. Pro tip? Try to find a way to slip it naturally into the conversation–otherwise you may just come off as a pretentious weirdo instead of pants-charmer-extraordinaire. [Read: 55 funny quotes about love and all its funny complications]
#5 DON’T talk about your penis. Ever. If she wants to know its specs, she’ll find out for herself. We promise.
#6 DO ask her leading questions. If you can get your lady in question to open up about any given topic you bring up, you’ve pretty much got this in the bag. It doesn’t matter who you are: male, female, a pink-striped elephant–people love to talk about themselves.
Ask your girl a leading question about herself: where she grew up, what she wants to do with her life, what her best vacation was, and soon you’ll find your conversation is flowing naturally. One of the best ways to make a first impression is by showing the other person they can be comfortable around you, and that you will take an interest in what they have to say. [Read: How to talk to girls and leave them swooning over you!]
#7 DON’T be overly touchy. A shake of the hand is perfectly peachy at the beginning of the interaction, after introducing yourself, but getting handsy during a new encounter makes you come off like a creep. Watch where you put those hands, bud!
#8 DO be nice. Believe it or not, people aren’t generally used to receiving kindness from strangers. For example, let’s say you see a gorgeous girl in front of you at a Starbucks. If you’re really into this girl *in that weird “I like you from afar” way we tend to crush on people*, why not spring for her coffee while you’re in line, open the door for her when you leave, and offer a friendly smile? Nobody smiles anymore, so even this simple gesture can set you apart quickly!
[Read: The secret guide to getting any girl’s attention no matter where you are]Alright, so we can’t all be Mr. Charming when it comes to talking to our dream girl – especially when we’ve only got 7 seconds! To have a fighting chance, follow our rules, and you’ll be on your way to a much more charming, likeable first impression.
