Almost everyone experiences heartbreak at least once or twice in their life. It could be because of a loss of a loved one, saying goodbye to a dear friend, and even moving away from a place you call home. Some heartbreaks are more painful than others, but one thing is for sure – the sadness that is caused by a breakup can be unbearable.
Most breakups can easily change a person’s life – and not for the better. Sometimes, people who suffer from this type of heartbreak cope by either shutting themselves off from the world or losing their confidence and trust in themselves and in others.
Indeed, a breakup can cause irreversible damage to anyone and this article will help you figure out the smart ways to deal with this negative life event.
Here they are.
1. Don’t make decisions right away.
It’s not a wise move to make big decisions if you’re still too affected and emotional about everything that happened. Most people tend to fall into this mistake and often suffer more tragic and equally heartbreaking consequences after.
It can be comforting to think that your immediate response like leaving, going away or even burning bridges is a sign that you can easily move on, but you’re just hurting yourself more.
ALSO READ: 12 Wise Things to Do After a Painful Breakup
2. Give yourself time to calm down.
As part of the process of dealing with a breakup, the next step that you should take is to give yourself the time and space to calm down. First of all, you have to learn how to get rid of all the negative and unnecessary emotional baggage that you just could not let go.
Anger and bitterness are examples of these unhealthy emotions that can triple the weight of the emotional burden, so try to let these toxic feelings go before it’s too late.
3. Tell yourself that it’s okay not to be totally okay.
Some people who are experiencing the emotional and psychological aftermath of a breakup think that staying strong means not admitting that they are not okay. This sense of denial that they’re unaffected and that they should not feel hurt can do more harm than good. Suppressing these emotions can cause long-term effects, and it’s just a matter of time until you explode.
Tell yourself that it’s okay to feel whatever you’re feeling. Tell yourself that it’s okay to cry, to be vulnerable, and to admit that you’re weak. It’s a part of the process.
4. Surround yourself with the right support system.
It’s important that you know the right people to trust especially during the hardest stages of a breakup. Be with friends who are willing to listen to your story, and be with people who genuinely want the best for you. Remember that while others can be supportive, some will remind you of the reality that you have to face after the breakup.
Some pieces of advice can be inspiring while some can be blunt and can make the pain worse. Learn from all of them but make sure that you make the decisions on your own.
5. Find activities that will make you feel good about yourself.
Once you think that you’re finally ready to get out and live your life again, it’s time to do something fun and positive. How?
Plan some activities, interactions or engagements that will make you feel good about yourself. Learn a new hobby, go to the salon, travel to a nice destination, meet new people, go dancing – anything that will remind you that life can still be fun even if you’re not in a relationship.
6. Learn and practice self-love – and don’t be guilty about it.
Love yourself and don’t ever let anyone tell you that you’re being selfish just because you decided to choose yourself first. A toxic relationship that led to a breakup can be emotionally draining.
It’s true especially if you’ve given everything and every part of you in that relationship only to lose yourself in the process. This exhaustion can make you feel less confident, uninspired, bored and even unwilling to try new things, so it’s important to know where you can get that emotional refill and confidence boost.
7. Focus on your social and professional life.
After a breakup, you have to give yourself enough time to heal and restore what you have lost especially if the relationship you had made you give up other aspects of your life. Once you’re finally ready to face the world again, your focus should shift to your social and professional life. Why?
Achievements in your career can give you more reasons to look at life more positively especially after all the negative emotions that you’ve suffered from. Social interactions, on the other hand, can help you get your confidence back.
8. Don’t be in a rush to be in a new relationship.
Most people think that the only way to move on is to be in a new relationship. While this is the most common remedy for heartbreak, it’s a faulty one. Why?
Before entering into a new relationship, you have to make sure that you’re emotionally available. It’s also important that you’re no longer carrying the same emotional baggage that has burdened you while still dealing with your previous breakup. Aside from the fact that it’s unfair to the other person, it can be one of the reasons why this new relationship might not last long.
ALSO READ: 15 Things You Should Never Do After You Break Up with Someone
9. Enjoy your freedom and learn to celebrate being single.
Being single can be the most liberating stage in one’s life, especially after a terrible breakup. It’s the time when you can finally love yourself more. Moreover, not being in a commitment will give you the opportunity to be the best version of yourself and to grow as a person.
While a breakup can be devastating, it’s not going to end the world – unless you allow it to. Remember, the first person who can help you put your life back together is yourself.
Hopefully, these smart ways to deal with a breakup will help you find your way back to a happy, satisfying and fulfilled life. Good luck!