Love/Dating

First Date Nerves: 16 Signs He’s A Better Kisser Than You

Never underestimate the value of a good kiss. While some people might pass off kissing as an unimportant element of a relationship, the chemistry you and your partner have while locking lips can count for a lot. Not only can it positively or negatively influence your feelings towards them, but it can also be an indication of how well you suit each other overall in the relationship. In short, kisses are a big deal! So you’ll probably want to know sooner rather than later whether the man (or woman) you’re seeing is good with their lips or not.

RELATED: Thoughts Every Guy Has When He Kisses You For The First Time

What makes a good kiss is a little different for everybody. Technique and moves can be important, but passion and confidence usually make much more of a difference. A combination of these things, plus the other person’s specific preferences, will decide whether somebody’s a good kisser or not.

You won’t know for sure whether the person you’re dating is good at kissing until you actually get to that moment, but there are certain things to look out for that can help you make an informed guess. People who are talented at locking lips tend to display different body language than others, and the confidence that helps them be so good at kissing shines through in other areas of their life too.

Check out this list to find out whether the person you’re seeing is likely to be a better kisser than you are!

16He’s Not Afraid To Try New Things And Has An Open Mind

Having an open mind helps you out in a lot of situations in life. People who aren’t stubborn or limited in their willingness to try new things are usually more adaptable to a variety of scenarios, and kissing happens to be one of them.

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You might think that there is only one way to kiss, but all you have to do to dispel that theory is watch Spiderman! If upside-down kissing is a thing, then you can bet there are endless other ways to have fun with kissing, and if the person you’re with is open to at least a couple of them, you could end up having a really good time together. Plus, his having an open mind will make things less awkward if you have any kissing mishaps—and they do happen to the best of us!

15Although He’s Charismatic, He’s Not Arrogant Or A Show-Off

Of course, you want your date to be charismatic, but there’s quite a distinction between being confident and likable, and being arrogant. While you’ll be naturally drawn to a charismatic person, an arrogant person is cocky, not only believes in themselves but thinks they’re better than everybody else, and will probably leave you feeling uncomfortable.

Arrogant people, those who like to brag or show-offs usually don’t make the best kissers. Although there’s a chance that they are a great kisser, know it and that’s why they’re cocky, there’s more of a chance that they’re deluded about how good they are, not just in kissing, but in life. Someone who’s big-headed like that will probably think they’re pleasing you when they’re not and will be less open to feedback.

14If He Doesn’t Take Himself Too Seriously, He’ll Probably Put Himself Out There For You

People who don’t take themselves too seriously are a lot of fun to be around and are usually a breath of fresh air. The best part about them is that they’re rarely judgmental and you don’t feel like you’re under a lot of pressure when you’re with them—if you make any mistakes, say the wrong thing or even make a fool of yourself, they’re more likely to laugh it off than hold it against you.

When it comes to kissing, this kind of person tends to be willing to put himself out there for you, because he doesn’t really mind if he ends up looking a bit silly. This could mean that he’s willing to take risks and try new things to make a kiss especially steamy, and he won’t make you feel bad about it if it doesn’t work out.

13You Can Tell From His Body Language That He’s Passionate About Life

There are a lot of things in life that are dull and totally without passion, but if you ask us, romance should not be one of them! Kissing, in particular, should be fueled by passion and an invisible chemistry that you share between you. That’s why people who are zestier and passionate in general tend to be better kissers.

You can usually tell how passionate and enthusiastic a person is on the whole after spending a little time with them. People like this get easily excited about various things, tend to have strong reactions and are normally full of energy. The way he eats his food can say a lot about what kind of kisser he is too—the experts say that a passionate eater is more often than not a passionate kisser!

12He’s Adaptable To Different Circumstances And Stays Cool Under Pressure

Kissing is supposed to be fun, but we can probably all agree that it can bring on some stress. When two people aren’t on the same page, haven’t kissed yet, or have different levels of experience from each other, the anticipation can lead to a whole ton of anxiety. And this anxiety can even make one person reluctant to take that step and have that first kiss.

Someone who can stay cool under pressure will probably be a good kisser because they’ll be able to withstand that initial stressful stage where you both might be feeling some anxiety. Some people might be good at kissing when they’re comfortable, but totally crumble when they’re feeling nervous or if they can sense that their partner is nervous. On the other hand, people who are good at dealing with anxiety and pressure anyway will be able to maintain their skills even when it gets a little daunting.

11His Sense Of Humor Is Solid And He Isn’t Judgmental

A good sense of humor is a quality trait that most of us look for in a date. Not only are people who can appreciate a joke more fun to be around, but they also tend to be less judgmental, which is especially helpful if you’re a little nervous.

We can’t stress enough that even the best kissers among us can mess it up. Heads can twist the wrong way and bump into each other, saliva can flow a little too freely and one person can misjudge how much the other one actually likes tongue action—all these things can lead to awkwardness, but if you’re with somebody who has a good sense of humor, they’re more likely to laugh about it than be too scared to go in and give it another try.

10He’s A Good Listener And He Knows How To Focus And Concentrate

kisser somebody is, but it actually makes a huge difference. Kissing is an interactive activity, after all, and if you’re doing it right, you should be listening and responding to each other. It’s important to let your partner know if you think there’s too much tongue or you’re not comfortable with hand placement or anything else, and it’s equally important that they listen. A good listener, and someone who knows how to concentrate on your reactions, will adjust accordingly to how you’re feeling during the kiss.

Good listeners don’t have to be told the same things over and over again, and someone who’s intuitive or focused on you will often know things without you having to say anything at all. For example, someone who offers you their jacket without being asked because they can see you’re shivering is the kind of person you want!

9While He’s Strong, He’s Not Too Aggressive Or Intimidating

Even if you’re into a strong, alpha-male type, it’s usually not a good idea to get involved with someone who’s overly aggressive or intimidating. Guys can be “manly” and strong without having to squash other people in their path, don’t forget. Somebody who feels the need to intimidate others usually doesn’t have as much inner-strength as you think—after all, to uplift himself, he has to put others down!

Somebody who’s obviously aggressive with you, or pushy in any way, most likely won’t make a fantastic kisser. He’ll probably be forceful, rough or completely uninterested in what you want out of the kiss. It’s fine if you like the other person to be in control during a kiss, but make sure at the very least you have mutual respect and understanding.

8He’s Not An Awkward Person And Knows How To Use His Hands

We know that awkwardness isn’t something that a lot of people can help, and there’s no need to steer clear of awkward people in general. Although someone isn’t a great talker or confident at social events, they might end up being an awesome kisser! In general, though, someone who’s particularly clumsy or completely unaware of themselves won’t make the best kiss you’ve ever had.

RELATED: Things You Should Never Do While Kissing

Hands definitely come into kissing, so it’s a good idea to pay attention to how your date uses their hands. Constant fumbling and fidgeting isn’t a good sign, but someone who knows how to connect with you using their hands will more than likely know how to use them during the kiss. Watch out for hand-holding or softly grazing your back in a subtle way.

7You Can Tell He’s Super Generous And Cares About What You Want

Kissing is a two-way street, and each person should be thinking about how the other is feeling. It should never just be about the pleasure of only one party. So naturally, those who are generous and care about what other people want in other situations probably make good kissers in that regard. Their goal going into the kiss will be to make it a good experience for you.

It’s easy to tell whether someone is self-absorbed or genuinely interested in how you feel and what you want. This kind of person will listen to what you need and will generally want to go out of their way to do things for you. They shouldn’t totally sacrifice their whole lives for you, but your happiness will still be one of their priorities.

6You’ve Heard From Other People That He’s A Good Kisser

Comments from other people don’t always mean a lot. Sometimes exes and past flings can lie out of spite and say someone was a bad hookup when they weren’t, or can even say they were great even if they weren’t, if they’re interested in getting them back. But at the same time, if you hear a lot of the same thing, there’s a good chance there’s some truth behind it. After all, where there’s smoke …

RELATED: Bad Kisses We’ve All Experienced

If you keep hearing from various sources that he’s a good kisser, he probably is. But keep in mind that everybody’s definition of a good kisser is slightly different, so you still shouldn’t completely trust any clue until you’ve seen what you’re dealing with for yourself.

5Overall, He’s A More Confident And Calm Person Than You Are

The saying tells us to fake it until we make it, but more often than not, people who are genuinely confident have a good reason to be. They know there’s something they can do that’s worthwhile, and we all deserve to feel like that. If your date is confident (but as we’ve said, not cocky!), it could be because he knows he’s the best when it comes to kissing. His confidence around you, in particular, could show that he’s particularly faithful in his romancing skills, and kissing is a big part of that.

Flustered and anxious people can still be good kissers, but that’s not as likely to be the case. These kinds of people are more likely to crumble under pressure or be too scared to initiate the kiss in the first place.

4Spontaneity Is His Thing, And He Likes To Spice It Up

The person who loves to be free, try new things and leap with closed eyes will probably be a totally different kisser to someone who is afraid of change and thrives on routine and security. There is room for both, but if you classify an exciting and slightly surprising kiss as a good one, then the former is probably the person to look out for!

If your date loves being spontaneous, surprising you and changing things up so they don’t get dull, you can probably expect the same from his kisses. You’re much more likely to get that upside-down Spiderman kiss from somebody like this. More reserved types and those who live life on the safe side can still surprise you with an earth-moving kiss, but that would certainly be a surprise!

3He Always Stays On Top Of His Hygiene And Cleanliness

Passion counts for a lot. Confidence is important. Chemistry and listening skills and generosity all come into play when making a great kisser. But none of that matters if the person you’re kissing has poor hygiene. Oral hygiene, in particular, is especially important when it comes to kissing. It doesn’t matter if he looks like Brad Pitt—you’re not going to want to go back for more if he had bad breath. Other dental issues like excessive cavities, mouth infections, or gingivitis can also make kissing a nightmare.

Someone who’s generally unclean would probably be hard to kiss, especially if you have a strong sense of smell or a complex with germs. This is usually fairly obvious before you move in for the kiss, but it can still catch you by surprise if you don’t pay attention!

2He Seems More Excited To Get To The Kiss Than You Are

Out of the two of you, who is more excited to get to the kiss? If he seems more eager than you, it could just mean that he feels lucky to be on a date with you and really wants to kiss you, but it could also mean that he just knows he has something great to offer and can’t wait to impress you.

This isn’t always the case, but it’s usually not a good sign if he keeps putting the kiss off or trying to avoid it altogether. Of course, this could just mean that he’s nervous, or that he’s simply not into you, but it could also mean that he knows he’s lacking in that area. You won’t know for sure until you actually get there—if you ever do!

1His Experience With Dating Is More Extensive Than Yours

This is another sign that could mean he’s a good kisser but doesn’t guarantee anything. Like another skill, you’d think that a person’s kissing would improve the more they did it. Even if they weren’t naturally a great kisser, they should pick up a few pointers along the way and get better at it. So you could argue that someone who’s been with a lot of people is more likely to be a good kisser than somebody who’s had little to no experience.

But at the same time, there are people who don’t listen to advice and are completely unaware of themselves. People who are egotistical, resistant to change or terrible listeners can kiss one hundred dates and they still might not get any better at it, because they’re so stuck in their ways. You can take into consideration his kissing and dating history, but remember that it isn’t everything!

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