seeing is complicated, because you never know how it will go. Sometimes, it can be fun and exciting. Other times, it just ends up being dull and dreary. We all know which one we’d prefer, right? But how can you achieve that without knowing what awaits you? How can you be playful and fun without making your date think you’re trying way too hard to make her feel at ease?
Why being playful helps
If you want to diffuse a tense situation, the best way to do it is by keeping things light and breezy. Rather than faking your enthusiasm, why not build it up from scratch? When your date doesn’t seem to be enjoying herself, make it a point to start being playful around her.
There are many reasons why people aren’t having fun on a date. It could be due to a bad location, a rowdy or stale crowd, or it could even be your fault. It takes two to tango, and if neither one of you steps up, how do you think the night will end?
That’s where playfulness comes in. Your date might be too shy to do something about your situation, so it’s your job to flip the vibe into something more fun and exciting. I know it can be hard, especially if you’re not used to it, but think of how much it can help you.
Even if the date is going well, it won’t hurt to be more playful. The most obvious sign that you’re making a good impression is when your date can’t stop smiling and laughing with you.
Being playful does not mean that you are incapable of being serious. It just means that you are more appreciative of the little things that make people happy. If you don’t know how to generate a lighthearted ambience, here are some tips that can help you move forward.
Ways to be more playful
Playfulness can be subjective, especially if your date is too tense to notice. Everyone has a sense of humor, but it is your job to bring it to keep your date’s boredom at bay.
#1 Joke around. Try using a funny line you heard or tell your date a funny story. Either way, your chances of getting a laugh out of her is pretty high – considering the lack of joy in the situation.
#2 Take your date somewhere fun. There are a lot of places that offer fun and exciting activities for couples. You can sign up for a cooking class or play paintball. Do something that requires you to interact. An endorphin boost from a playful activity is also a bonus.
#3 Always smile. Did you know that smiling for no reason can actually improve your mood? That goes the same for smiling in order to make the people around you happier. Don’t creep her out by smiling for no reason. Tell her you’re just really psyched that you’re on a date together.
#4 Find something to tease her about. Some people aren’t really used to being teased, but it might just surprise your date and make her laugh. Tease her about something that definitely won’t offend her.
For instance, you can tease her about the way she looked like she was about to run the moment she saw you. Make sure she knows that you’re just kidding around, though. It’s better not to push a button that you might regret later. If she doesn’t like it, pull back. Immediately.
#5 Make her blush. The purpose of this exercise is to urge your date to show a little bit of her vulnerable side. Aside from trying to amuse your date with your playful antics, you can make her blush by complimenting her or appreciating something good that she’s done.
#6 Flirt! It’s as easy as saying your date’s name in a * way. Make your date feel wanted and admired. Just focus on her and every word that she says. You can also slip in a little quip here and there about the possible outcome of your date.
#7 Be spontaneous. Planning everything to the last detail guarantees a higher chance of success. Playing your night by ear can give you the best date of your life or possibly the worst. Either way, doing fun things on a whim ensures that you and your date start the night on a happy note.
#8 Keep the conversation light. Steer the conversation away from topics like politics, work and relationships. Talk about traveling, exciting hobbies, funny stories and the like. You’re not manipulating the conversation per se. You’re just focusing on the happier aspects of each other’s lives.
#9 Touch her when the mood feels happy and nice. This advice can be complicated, because some people are vehemently opposed to getting their personal space invaded. Your options are to start by supporting their back as you walk into the venue. If she doesn’t bristle or slap you in the face, you’re good to go. Ask to hold her hand while you talk.
If she responds favorably to your touches, you can try to bring it up a notch by tapping her chin when she smiles. At the end of a good night of flirting and light touches, you can lightly brush her jaw with your fingers when you say good night.
#10 Pull a cute and harmless prank. Emphasis on the harmless part. Don’t try a prank that can rile a person up. You never know if they’ll get the joke or not. Try something safe. Make a joke about changing the date’s location to somewhere weird like a department store or a nail salon. Give her a sock as a gift and then show her the flowers you were hiding. The internet is a treasure trove of cute pranks like these.
When not to be playful
Before you pull out a whoopee cushion, you should always be aware of how your partner reacts. If she seems withdrawn and indifferent, draw her out by conversing and asking questions about her life. If that doesn’t work, there may be a reason why your playfulness won’t cut it.
#1 She’s sick. Some people don’t want to admit that they feel a little under the weather out of politeness or a genuine eagerness to please the people around them. Ask your date how she’s feeling, and if she admits that she doesn’t feel too good, tell her that you can postpone the date when she feels better.
#2 She had the worst day at work. The most frustrating part about being a professional is that the stresses of your work environment can reflect on how you interact with people outside of work. Your date might not want to talk about it, so try to ask about stuff that does not relate to work at all.
#3 She has a family personal conflict in her life. There are some things that happen in our lives that we just can’t control. If your date is going through something really tough, she might not be open to a few chuckles. When it feels like she doesn’t want to talk about her life, try to steer the conversation towards the present. Talk about the food, the restaurant or what happened while you were driving to pick her up.
#4 She’s just not that into you. Sorry, but it happens. You’ll know this is true when all your efforts to start a nice conversation seem to fail. It could be due to your physical appearance, your demeanor or just a regular feeling of doubt. Either way, I suggest that you just finish up your dinner, skip the dessert and politely offer to take your date home. If you’re nice enough about it, you might end up becoming good friends.
