What is DM? Direct message, of course. If you’re wondering how to DM a girl, it isn’t as complex as it seems. It used to be that you needed some connection to a girl to get her to go out with you. But nowadays, if you have a computer or smartphone, you can reach out to anyone from anywhere and kindle a relationship.
If you want to know how to DM a girl right, then you should say something sincere without coming across as clingy. Be charming enough to get her to take you seriously.
As a woman, I know when I get a message from a guy, the first thing I do is analyze what they are after, who they are, and whether I am even interested in pursuing any further communication with them.
Much like online dating, the first communication you have with a girl can be the maker or the breaker. If you don’t say the right thing right out the gate, then you could find yourself out of the running. That is why taking steps to do it right is so critical.
How to DM a girl – 10 don’ts you just can’t ignore
Whether it is LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram, or Snapchat, your message should be targeted and not pushy. Girls are constantly inundated with friendship requests from guys they don’t know. If you don’t want to get the same second glance, then put some effort into making her look twice.
Some things turn her on to you and other things get you turned off or blocked. Knowing the difference between the two is the key to not blowing your one and only shot.
#1 Don’t be creepy. Don’t say anything that is within the realm of creepy. Things that qualify as creepy are things that make her uncomfortable like commenting on something about her s*xual appearance or saying something that indicates that maybe you have a screw loose. If you have been lusting after her, it is best not to let that cat out of the bag.
#2 Don’t sound like a stalker. Don’t say things about what you already know about her. The key to DMing a girl is to make it sound matter of fact, not like you know everything about her. That just screams stalker.
#3 Don’t be too eager. A girl likes a guy who finds her attractive, but she also likes a little bit of a mystery and a challenge too. If you want her to want to get to know you, then you can’t be too eager and make it sound like you are desperate.
#4 Don’t be s*xual up front. It is okay to totally want to get in her pants, we know that you do, but keep it to yourself at first. You make girls uneasy when you start talking about s*xual things too early.
It isn’t that we don’t want you to aDMire our assets, we just don’t want you to talk about them as an introduction to us. If you like the shape of her ass, keep that to your internal voice and say something nons*xual to begin.
#5 Don’t be too serious. When you DM a girl, keep it funny and witty. No girl wants to be hit with something super serious. That means you should think of something unique and funny instead of something serious and grave.
A fine line to walk, you don’t want to make it cheesy and pick up liney, rather just something smart and witty to make her smile a little and want to respond to you.
#6 Don’t put it all out there. A girl doesn’t want to read an entire paragraph from a guy who is interested. She wants a one liner that she reads quickly and responds to. If you give too many details or too much information, then she thinks you are too much work and might not want to put that much effort into someone she doesn’t know.
#7 Don’t leave it so that she isn’t compelled to answer. If you leave her a message that isn’t in the form of a question or something that she wants to retort back to, then you aren’t giving her incentive to answer.
#8 Don’t reach out more than once unless she answers back. Just like in texting, calling, or any other form of communication, if she doesn’t answer you, then don’t wrongly assume that she just didn’t get it.
Once you send the DM, sit back and wait for her to answer. If she doesn’t answer, then it won’t make her more interested if you continue to reach out. It only leaves her with a creepy feel, and you are bound to get blocked.
#9 Don’t play games. If you DM a girl and she answers you straight away don’t be a dick and wait to answer her back. If you are lucky enough to get her to answer your message promptly, then you should be courteous enough to return the favor.
#10 Don’t be random, wait for your chance. When you are DMing a girl, then you want to wait for your chance. If you watch her feed, then look for a picture that you can comment on or something that she posts that you can compliment her on.