The love that once burned inside you for them is now burning you alive. You feel the black smoke filling the room and suffocating you. There are no escapes or exit signs. The only thing you can do now is go through the smoke in hopes that it won’t collapse your lungs. You take it day by day, but with every day that passes, the breaths you take in get heavier.
You are unable to get accustomed to the schedule you have now; it’s impossible to recreate. The only schedule you know is the one that involves them in it, and you slowly mark off every day on the calendar that has gone by without them.
The peaceful breakfast you used to enjoy together is now a rushed cup of coffee because you spent the whole night longing for them. The morning cuddles where your bodies became one are now replaced by lonely morning jogs to clear your head.
You could never have foreseen that the person you were navigating the waters with would be the one who would drown you in them.
It all changed with the weather; one day it was sunny and beautiful out, the breeze from the water gently hitting your face, and the next it was a loud thunderstorm creating aggressive waves that destroyed everything in their way.
You have endured different kinds of pain, but if you were to pick your poison now, you would take a broken bone over a broken heart. The sound of a heart breaking is silent, but the pain is loud. An x-ray could never tell you how your heart will heal from this excruciating break. A doctor can’t give you a cast to wrap your heart in and send you on your way to relax. Time is the only healer of this, and the hands on the clock feel as though they’ll never move.
It’s the most you have ever cried, the least you have ever slept, and the scariest feeling you have ever felt, because now nothing is predictable in your book. The one thing you thought was solid in your life has now evaporated.
You are facing the inevitable, and the word for that is fate. What is not meant for you will never be for you, no matter how hard you fight for it. You can kick and punch all you want, but fate will punch you right back in the head, catching you off guard and knocking you right off your path. Fate will let you walk the path you want to be on until it finally turns you into a brighter one. It will close the book on a one-chapter kind of love and eventually open another chapter to the kind of love that completes the entire story.
You will convince yourself that you lost the best thing that could have ever happened to you until the best thing that actually happens to you is standing right there in front you, smiling.