It’s impossible to have everything in common with your person. You’re two different humans, so there are going to be differences in opinion. There are going to be spots where you diverge. And that’s okay. You’re not supposed to have the same personality. But you are supposed to respect each others hobbies and interests. You are supposed to care about what they care about, at least a little.
Of course, this doesn’t mean you need to pick up all of the same hobbies as them. It doesn’t mean you need to pretend to have an interest in things that excite them. It doesn’t mean you need to force yourself to change.
It simply means that you’re always there to listen to them. It means you never roll your eyes when they’re talking about something that excites them. It means you never make fun of them for how much they love a certain activity or game or show or song. It means you show respect for all of their favorites, the same way you hope they show respect for yours.
You should be excited when your person is excited. You should be happy when your person is happy. You shouldn’t want to ruin their fun, simply because you don’t understand it, or because you’re not involved in it.
When you love someone, you should listen to them when they get excited. You shouldn’t mindlessly nod along like you couldn’t care less about what they’re saying. You shouldn’t count down the moments until they shut up. You should give them a chance to express themselves, to get pumped up, to brag about whatever it is that has them so excited.
If your person is passionately pursuing a project, you should support them. You should encourage them. You should give them pep talks when they’re feeling down about themselves. You should make sure they know you’re in their corner. You should remind them you believe they have what it takes to do this, even when they have their doubts.
When you love someone, their priorities should mean a lot to you, too. You should hope they achieve their dreams, hope they have a good time, hope everything works out well for them.
When you love someone, you should care about the things they care about, even if it’s not really your style. If going to a certain movie or concert would make them happy, you should go without complaining. You should go without pointing out how much they owe you for agreeing to the favor. You should go without making them feel guilty for having different interests than you.
You should want your person to be happy. You should want to do things that get them excited. And you should feel confident that, if the roles were reversed, they would do the same for you. You should know that you’re not the only one putting in effort. They should consistently do the same exact thing for you because you care about each other’s happiness more than anything else.