When it comes to picking up girls, there is a tendency for us guys to rely upon the same old favored haunts and environments. There are reasons for this, of course. First of all, these places have been tried and tested, and have produced the right kind of result in the past. Secondly, there is a definite comfort factor to them. We probably know half the people there, and this provides a very welcome boost to our confidence. Finally, it’s quite probable that we have frequented these places for so long, that we no longer have any idea where else to go.
There is probably nothing particularly wrong with the situational choices you have so far made in your quest to charm your way into a woman’s affections – or panties, if that’s more what you have in mind – and some of the more established locations for pursuing this end have no doubt produced some of the best relationships. However, there are some significant reasons why you might want to shake up your usual approach.
The usual suspects
So where are the usual places that guys go to pick up girls and why change? What’s wrong with them? Well, the following list of three most typical sharking venues are discussed in turn, each with reasons as to exactly why they might not be the best of the available options.
#1 Nightclubs and bars. The number one choice for all ventures into the dating arena, nightclubs and bars provide a regular flow of conquests for the experienced chick-magnet. However, there are several reasons why this particular venue might not be quite as ideal as you think.
For a start, you are unlikely to obtain any real idea of what the girl you are talking to is actually like, with all that deafening music providing the ultimate barrier to communication. Next, alcohol often comes into play at these venues, and it impairs the judgment of both yourself and your potential conquest. This is unlikely to lead you to find the perfect date.
Finally, you have a significant chance when trawling the same old places of bumping into ex-girlfriends, their friends, their family and anyone else who now thinks that you exist somewhere on the evolutionary scale between sea slugs and vampire bats… And that’s not going to help your prospects now, is it?
#2 Work. There are some occupations such as teachers and medical staff who work such long hours, that the only chance they have of meeting someone else of the opposite sex is at work – and they very often fall uncomplainingly into that very same stereotype.
However, this is not the ideal place to find someone to set up a relationship, if only because of what may happen if you separate at some point. Arguments, obstructiveness, pettiness and awkwardness are bound to spring up – which is exactly why so many employers have clauses in their contracts dissuading workers from doing that. Even if separation is not forthcoming, your personal life might interfere with your professional life, as well.
#3 Through friends and family. The fall back of the wallflower, getting a date through family and friends can not only just be a little bit pathetic, but it also has the potential for severe repercussions. Separation is hard enough, but what you really don’t want is family and/or friends getting on your back – or even falling out with you – as a result.
The alternative places to meet single women
Although not every option on the following list may be everyone’s cup of tea, there should be enough suggestions for you to find at least one that appeals to you. Of course, it often depends upon the kind of girl you’re looking for, and if you’re reading this article I’m just guessing that you’re looking for something a little different to the tarts and booze hounds that you usually end up with on your mascara-stained pillow!
#1 On the street. This is a difficult one to pull off, and you have to get your planning right, but do it with style, and leave the woman in question feeling like she’s just been swept off her feet. The trick is to make it look spontaneous whilst being carefully planned for, but get it right and you will instantly achieve white knight status. Chat her up by asking for the time, by asking if she’s waiting for the same bus as you, or even a plain and simple “hello” combined with a smile would work.
#2 The supermarket. This sounds like a really strange option, but it has become an increasingly popular one, so much so that in the UK, a few years ago, many of the leading supermarkets introduced a singles shopping night once a week in the later hours. It’s hard to tell what kind of woman you’d end up with if you give this a go, but one advantage of the glaring bright, white supermarket lights is that you’ll be able to see straight through any heavily administered attempts at make-up camouflage.
#3 The internet. Another increasingly popular option, and once the subject of ridicule. However, there is no better way of getting to know someone without actually having to commit to meeting them, until you are truly sure you want to progress the relationship. And you get to know everything about them in advance, so that you can prepare accordingly.
#4 Library or bookstore. Another great option. Full of people browsing at their own pace and there are bound to be a few ladies in there who tickle your fancy. It’s one of the only places where you can linger in their presence without looking like a stalker, and you can also learn something about them in advance from which aisles they’re frequenting.
#5 Church. If you’re looking for the kind of girl you can take home to momma, then where else better to look than the church or any other religious institution and any of the associated social events. You might not get a knee trembler behind the chapel after service, but some of those girls have been pretty repressed, and can’t wait to let loose on the guy who finally shows her some interest.
#6 The park. This is similar to the street in that if you do it right, you can come across as a real white knight charmer, the confident bad boy that every girl secretly wishes for. The advantage that the park has over the street is that you get more time to identify and select your next target. If you don’t want to look like you’re just there to pick up women, bring your dog or a book, or you can opt to go jogging there.
#7 At a concert or musical event. It has the disadvantage of noise, much as the night club scenario, but at least you know from the very beginning that you have something in common and an immediately accessible conversation point, should you manage to get to that stage. And all concerts have to end at some point, right?
#8 At classes. Cooking classes, language classes, pottery classes *think: the movie Ghost!*, it doesn’t matter what the class is, as long as members of the opposite sex attend. You have a common point of interest, prolonged exposure to any potential targets, and once you get to know them, you can offer to walk them back home or to their car – a perfect opportunity to ask them out on a date.
#9 The gym. Similar to entry number nine on classes, although you do have to take a little more care not to come across as some kind of pervert. However, you do get that common point of interest again, as well as a potential girlfriend with a body to die for – or at least one who’s on her way there.
#10 The coffee shop. The home of the sophisticated and the conversationalist. If this is the kind of woman that you’d prefer to entertain, then the coffee shop is for you. Plenty of opportunities to make eyes over a tall latte!
So, it doesn’t all have to be a drunken fumble in the back of a taxi. Try some of these alternative meetings places to start a relationship with the kind of girl you believe you deserve.